There’s always that one person that knows how to push your buttons. When someone is trying to upset you, the worst thing you can do is oblige them.

If you reward their behaviour, you encourage them to do the same thing again in the future. Instead, you can take control of the situation by taking control of yourself and responding in a better way.

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Remember, that others may push your buttons, but you control your response:

So here are my top 9 ways to respond when another person pushes your buttons.

1. Stay calm.

You’re much bigger than a few bitter or negative words. Take a deep breath, think about something pleasant, and move on. Calming yourself is a skill and it comes with practice.  Soon, nothing will be able to upset you.

2. Consider if you’re at fault in any way.

Is it possible that you are complaining or being a little difficult? Are you unreasonably fussy or a perfectionist? If that’s the case, you’ll probably draw some unwanted comments, fair or not. Look at the situation from the other persons eyes and see if  a different course of action could improve things.

 3. Consider why they’re trying to upset you.

Does the other person dislike you? Perhaps they are trying to be funny? Is it about control? What could be the purpose of their behaviour? Once you know the motivation, you’ll be in a better position to choose your response.

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4. Remove the reward.

If they’re trying to be funny, just tell them you don’t appreciate it. If they’re trying to upset you, smile and move on. When they don’t get the reaction they’re looking for, they will usually stop.

5. Deal with your buttons.

They are your buttons after all. Consider why you are so delicate about this issue? What can you do to remove all the emotion surrounding it? Your personal buttons are your responsibility to deal with. Enjoy the freedom that comes from eradicating them.

6. Address your buttons with others.

Maybe you’re sensitive about your weight or your faith. Let others know which topics you would prefer to avoid. The other person might be happy to accommodate you in the future. It’s important to speak up.

7. Stick up for yourself.

It’s possible that the other person doesn’t know that they’re upsetting you. Speak up for yourself and tell them how you feel. No one can read your mind. Take responsibility for letting others know how you want to be treated.

8. Realise that harmful comments come from personal insecurities.

Often people react negatively, due to insecurities within themselves.  Being aware of this will help you respond in a more measured and understanding way.  Try to feel compassion for the other person and avoid taking the comments seriously.

 9. Leave the situation.

if necessary, leave the situation if you’re very upset. It happens. Take a break and give yourself a few minutes to collect your thoughts and calm down your emotions. Everyone needs a time-out on occasion.

You can then go back with a calm mind and refreshed attitude.

To Sum Up

It’s no fun when others are trying to push your buttons. However, you don’t have to get upset when someone else tries to antagonise you. Take control of the situation and your emotions. Do what you can to discourage the other person. Maintain your serenity and choose your response wisely. You’ll find that others are pushing your buttons less and less.

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To your success

Paul

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